August 10th, 2009
We married young. And we did things a little backwards.
Our history is a very complicated story. A story that is no where NEAR finished. I know I need to continue to write the “The Truth Is” series. I left off on Part 5 and there is much more to write. But our story is an ongoing saga and it continues to be written every day.
We were married 7 years ago today. It was STEAMY outside. August in Tennessee is rarely anything but hot and humid. And I remember that day being happy. Surreal and anxious and HOT but happy.
I am married to my best friend. We haven’t made it easy on ourselves and we have certainly had many obstacles.
We have hurt each other and neither one of us have been perfect spouses. But we always know that we love each other. We always know that we love each other. I meant to repeat that.
Things I love about Mr.007:
When I hear him refer to me as “my wife” it makes my stomach flutter.
I love how passionate he is about music. It is a part of his soul and it makes him who he is.
His hair is turning gray. To me he gets more handsome every year.
He wants to be our daughters’ hero. His love for those girls makes my love for him run even deeper.
He is the grill MASTER. I have acquired an appreciation for good BBQ and all sorts of “man food” since he has come into my life. I now understand why he ordered ribs on our first date.
He keeps ALL cards and letters. He has cards from his mom from before I even met him stashed in a box in the closet.
He sees his family as my family and vice versa.
He doesn’t mind driving the minivan. He has never said a negative thing about our van “Magic”.
He never makes fun of me for naming our van “Magic”
He unloads the dishwasher. Enough said.
He has excellent taste in beer.
Over the years he has endured countless hours of House Hunters with very few complaints.
He knows how much I love being pregnant and nursing babies and he hasn’t cut me off…yet. I think he needs a son!
He is an awesome provider and an extremely hard worker.
And it might be cliche but I love him because he makes me laugh.
Dear Mr.007 ,
I love you “very much a lot” and I feel blessed to share my life with you. Our family is enriched because of you.
Love,
Mrs.007
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November 10th, 2008
1. Life screeches to a halt when your 12 month old/ 7 year old/ you contract an evil stomach virus.
2. When the nurse says everyone in the house will probably get the aforementioned stomach flu. Believe her. Adam was the only one blessed enough not to contract the horrible nighmarish virus. And thank the good Lord above! He must have the immune system of a gladiator. Bless his heart though. He hardly slept and he did such a good job taking care of his house ful’ o girls.
3. Freakishly large piles of laundry will appear when 3 people are puking and diarrhea-ing.
4. I turn into a worrying anxious panicking mom when my kids have even the most common of childhood illnesses. All of a sudden I am freaking out about bacterial meningitis and the world is COMING TO AN END!
5. Tivo is even better when you can’t get up from the couch.
6. Adam is a really good puke cleaner upper/laundry do-er/disinfecter-er/soup cook-er/all night baby holder-er. I added that last -er just for fun. Filing all of that in my brain under good things to know.
7. Alvin and the Chipmunks is a really funny movie. We have had it for a year and I finally got to watch it while we were sick. We brought Addie’s old twin mattress downstairs into the hallway so she could be closer to the bathroom. Although we were both feeling pretty bad there were some really sweet moments. In between restroom visits, I shared my love of the Pottery Barn Kids catalog with Addison as we watched movies on a portable DVD player. Good times.
8. In the aftermath of the last week I have turned into a germ killing maniac. I am a pretty decent housekeeper, but I have been washing everything in scalding water and I bought a 4 pack of Clorox wipes at Sam’s yesterday.
9. My Google Reader has 233 unread items. I am ridiculously overwhelmed! There is no way that I can catch up at this rate so could everyone just do me a favor and STOP writing! I don’t want to miss a thing!
10. Number ten goes out to Jamie. I now know first hand how good it truly is to “not smell like diarrhea anymore.”
It’s good to be back. This week I have some things in mind to write and one of them involves an old story about Addison, lip gloss and the dog’s butt. Yeah…I’ll let you marinate on that for a while.
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November 5th, 2008
This post is Part Five of a true story. A story about Adam and I getting pregnant before marriage and how it has made our life together complicated, painful, wonderful and FULL of surprises. A story of how love can grow in even the most unlikely situations. If you haven’t already, you can read Part One here, Part Two here ,Part Three here, and Part Four here.
So there we were…Engaged and Underage. Well not both of us, I was 20 and Adam was 21. We were the parents of a toddler and we were about to get married.
And let me just say….I needed some bangs yo! My forehead is just not meant to be bared! Especially with what was going on with my eyebrows.
So we were showered with all of the things that we would need to set up a household. It was so exciting to pick out a china pattern and flatware. Here are my actual choices. I still love the patterns 6 years later. I hope I still love them for 24 more because from my observations people tend to hold onto these things for like 30 years.
Just a little tidbit…before my engagement I didn’t even know what flatware was. Silverware is silverware is silverware. Utensils. Forks and spoons. Knives even. But Betty at the Macy’s Bridal department opened my eyes to a whole new world of tableware and kitchen appliances.
I think I was more excited about playing house than I was about the actual wedding. I know how crazy that must sound but I was an unwed mother and I felt the need to be legitimized. Of course I loved Adam and I wanted to marry him, but I don’t think I really knew what it meant to be a wife. I can’t speak for Adam but I think, although he loved me too, he may have felt a little obligated to marry me. So at the time of our wedding I think we both were just young and ill equipped to fully grasp what we were about to embark upon.
Our wedding was a happy day and we went to Destin on our Honeymoon and Addison went to stay with Adam’s parent’s while we were gone. It was so hard to say goodbye to our baby, but it was the first time that Adam and I had ever been able to get away by ourselves.
And we had so much fun! Our honeymoon was WAY too short and 2 days after we came back Adam started a new job ( in addition to playing gigs and delivering pizza at night) and I went back to college.
We jumped right back into real life and everything that comes with it. We moved out of my parents house and we rented my Aunt Missy’s house while she was living in Texas.
And life was not easy. Adam worked VERY hard so that I could stay home with Addie on the days I didn’t have classes. I was a full time student and I was trying to figure out how to be a wife , mother and homemaker. It was way harder than I thought it would be. Honestly, I wasn’t very good at balancing my responsibilities AT ALL.
I am sitting here trying to think of something funny, but our first year of marriage was less honeymoon and more hard work. I would be lying if I said it was anything other than that. I temporarily forgot that God was in control and that all I needed to do was seek Him and I would find peace in that.
I was totally focused on Addison and my schoolwork and so many other things were neglected. One of those things was the housework. Laundry was always piled up and the house was usually a cluttered mess. I wasn’t a very good cook and one night I screwed up beef stroganoff so bad….well let’s just say that my cinnamon and my black pepper were in identical jars and no amount of rinsing or ketchup could help the situation.
One other minor detail I tended to push by the wayside was….my husband. I was exhausted, anxious and overwhelmed and ,to be completely candid, I wasn’t a very good christian wife at all. I think I might stop there for now. I will tell you all about the stupid mistakes I made and how much I SUCKED at being a wife in Part 6. Yay! I know you are all on pins and needles.
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September 26th, 2008
What tha crap? Read this article and then go have some dinner! Retch! That oughta deter one from smoking no? Thank you Fox News.
What’s going on with me you ask? Well:
-I have laundry piled up to my ears
-I have been dizzy all day ( is that weird?)
-Addison has a horrible flesh eating skin disease impetigo and the Dr advised that she stay home today. We have actually had a fun day.
-Adam’s good work insurance doesn’t take affect until Nov 1st and our temporary insurance doesn’t cover $h*t.
-Adam and I are leaving in an hour to go on a date and although I am soooo excited, I am having a fat day have nothing to wear and did I mention I am dizzy yo?
-the kitten has FLEAS! We have treated him twice with Frontline and I am highly irritated that it hasn’t worked!
-Adam probably would be irritated that I said that last thing about the fleas, but um well it’s my blog. Just sayin’
-I am so hoping to get a seat at this blogging conference! I am supah excited about the fact that it’s in Nashville!
-So yeah. I haven’t had wine all week. But all in all I have a pretty good attitude about everything.
I hope ya’ll have a fabulous weekend! oh and….GO DAWGS!
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September 4th, 2008
This post is Part Four of a true story. A story about Adam and I getting pregnant before marriage and how it has made our life together complicated, painful, wonderful and FULL of surprises. A story of how love can grow in even the most unlikely situations. If you haven’t already, you can read Part One here, Part Two here and Part Three here.
I think I left off right after Addison was born on April 27th, 2001. Adam and I were living with my parents at the time, so we didn’t have a typical nursery for her. Our room was big, so we just made her a sweet little mini-nursery in there.
Honestly, I didn’t really mind. I never daydreamed about my wedding or what my firstborn child’s room would look like. I never even thought about getting married and having children. It NEVER crossed my mind. I guess I just never thought that far ahead. In fact, not thinking ahead was a recurring theme in my life. Let’s just examine that for a moment shall we?
I have always been a smart, capable, average girl. Looking back I was pretty ignorant. I never applied myself in school. I didn’t prioritize anything. I was just…well….average. I didn’t excel at anything in particular because I didn’t try hard enough. I did just enough to get by without my parents giving me the disappointed lecture. I was ok with being a C+ student. Of course my parents tried to explain how the decisions that I made were going to affect me. I just literally let it go in one ear and out the other. All I cared about was hanging out with my friends and flirting with boys. And somehow I managed to graduate high school with a 2.9 GPA. Oh so underwhelming.
And oh yes I was a catch let me tell you. And I am sure it was a joy raising me. Sorry mom and dad.
So after years and years of “la-dee-da-tra-la-la…I am the only person on this planet” I found myself SOMEONE’S MOM. Looking back, my parent’s were probably wondering if I would step up to the plate. In fact, I know they were. I guess I just had one of those Aha! moments. I have had more than one of those moments since then, but maybe it was the first time I realized that I had to grow up. I no longer had the luxury of making decisions that only screwed up my own life. Now if I made a stupid choice or a bad decision it affected my child.
I had never felt that way before. I had never thought of anyone before myself. I think that was good in some ways because it helped me to become the Type A control freak person I am today. But it also made things harder for Adam and I. Of course I didn’t realize it at the time, but while I was trying to figure out how to be a mom to Addison, I was neglecting my relationship with her father.
But guess what ya’ll? He asked me to marry him anyway. On Mother’s Day in 2001 he planned a picnic on a beautiful hill at my grandmother’s farm. He drove Addison and I up the hill and surprised me with an engagement ring. We had no idea what we were getting ourselves into.
I will be back soon to air out the next portion of our dirty laundry. Until then, I am off to go and wash some actual real life dirty laundry. Thank you for reading and for more Fro’ me to you Thursday visit Kristen over at We are THAT family.
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July 31st, 2008
This post is Part Three of a true story. A story about Adam and I getting pregnant before marriage and how it has made our life together complicated, painful, wonderful and FULL of surprises. A story of how love can grow in even the most unlikely situations. If you haven’t already, you can read Part One here and Part Two here.
In Part two I talked about how Adam and I were dealing with our unexpected pregnancy and I think I left off at the part where his parents came up from Atlanta to offer their support and meet my parents. I guess you can imagine that the mood wasn’t exactly celebratory. No one was slapping Adam on the back, and no one was saying congratulations. Adam was a full time student, I had just dropped out of college and I was working at a clothing store. We weren’t ready to define our relationship let alone become parents together.
I guess it this had happened back in like 1955 I would have been shipped off to some convent and forced to give the baby up for adoption. Actually my mom did tell me just last year that she thought she was going to have to raise Addison. That should give you an idea of just how hard I was working to make my mom and dad proud. (dripping with sarcasm)
So anyway when Adam’s parents got to my parents house we all sat down in the living room to talk. My mom and dad were upset, but I remember my dad saying he hoped that everything worked out and they welcomed Adam as a part of our family. However, my parents also were pretty adamant that they didn’t think we should rush into marriage. His parents originally thought getting married would be the best thing for us, but I think that they quickly began to see that we could make this work and they agreed that we should take things slow.
So after we all began to feel more comfortable we started to allow ourselves to get excited. We were going to have a baby and married or not babies are a blessing from God. I still believe that today.
I know now that because I was the one with the baby growing inside of me it was easier for me to cope. I was able to feel her move and kick and I could feel her little hiccups. It has been easier for me from the very first day. I immediately loved this baby who would one day become my long legged Addison who loves to have her hair straightened and her toes painted. I felt like I was finally doing what I had been put on this earth to do. I had direction, and I had a purpose. I believe that although the timing felt wrong to us at the time, Addison was a gift from God in His perfect time.
I decided to move back into my parents house so I could take better care of myself. They has a nice big clean house that actually had food in the pantry and milk and veggies in the fridge. My pregnancy went by pretty fast because I was almost into my 2nd trimester when we found out.
We spent Thanksgiving with Adam’s family in Georgia and I met his extended family. That was fun and I fit in pretty well, but it was awkward for me at first. I was all “Hey ya’ll I’m Adam’s knocked up girlfriend from Tennessee”. Hehehe not really. Actually they welcomed me with open arms and my family did the same for Adam. Their were no harsh words and it was awesome to have all of the support.
Support has been a recurring theme in our lives from the very beginning. My aunts and coworkers gave me baby showers and Adam’s parents threw an awesome shower for us in Atlanta. No amount of thank you notes could suffice for the outpouring of generosity we experienced from both sides. We had all of the baby things and all we needed was our baby girl.
She finally graced us with her presence on April 27th, 2001. She gave us a scare and spent 6 days in the NICU, but we finally brought her home and started actually being someone’s parents. Adam had moved into my parents house while I was pregnant so he could finish school and so we could all be together. Because no matter what was happening, we knew that it was better when we were together.
I think I will wrap up Part 3 on that note. Check back for Part 4 soon! The picture I chose for this post makes me laugh at myself. If you look at the date it was the day before I gave birth. I was swollen and miserable by then and so ready to have Addison. My nose had grown to 3 times it’s normal size and I am pretty sure that is a forced smile. It’s hard to smile when your face feels tight from being so swollen. I look thrilled!
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July 28th, 2008
1. I have serious lighting concept issues. I never use the “big light” because I hate the way it makes the room feel. Instead I am constantly turning off lights and I always use lamps. I also hate dark corners. Yeah I know…I am in counseling so don’t you worry
2. Ironically I can never remember to turn off the bathroom and closet lights. Adam wised up and installed a “magic” bathroom switch that is powered by a motion sensor. When people come over to our house for the first time it’s really funny to watch them trying to figure that one out!
3. I have always been infuriated by “shanking”. If you ever think it might be funny to pull down my pants as a joke…I might be forced to get violent and get all redneck on yer arse. Just sayin.
4. The same thing goes for spanking. Addison has learned this one the hard way. Do. Not. Spank. Me. unless you wouldn’t mind being known for having a nub.
5. Have I mentioned I HATE clutter, which means mail (including bills and other important documents) gets put into drawers and lost forever. Some of ya’ll might remember my extreme dislike for clutter and my cute little nickname UberMom….read this post if you don’t.
6. All of my tops have to be a certain length. It’s called they have to be long enough to cover the wonderful little pouch of skin in my midsection I carry around now that I have had 2 babies. It’s like a little purse, only it’s not cute or fashionable. Those of you who do not have this wonderful belly purse and therefore don’t know what the fack I am talking about….well yall can just suck a stinky walrus toe. Yeah….I said it.
7. I am obsessed with my vacuum cleaner. If I wasn’t married to Adam and it was appropriate to be in a relationship with a vacuum, I would probably ask it out for cocktails.
8. I am an extreme over apologizer…when we go to the movies and we have to slide by people to get to our seats I say over and over…”Ya’ll I am so sorry…excuse me, sorry…so sorry” and so on and so on until I get to my seat.
9. The same goes for thank you’s. I have been known to send a thank you note thanking someone for a thank you gift that they sent me. Adam thinks I am crazy for doing that, but my mom scarred me for life because I refused to write my graduation gift thank you cards in a timely fashion. I actually said these words “I don’t know why I need to send them a thank you note….they WANTED to send me money…I didn’t ask them to”. Note to my 18 year old self: You are about to have objects hurled at you from the bottom of the stairs…just say yes ma’am and write the friggin’ thank you notes!. Sorry mom…I am pretty sure I would’ve done the same thing now that I have a mom’s point of view.
10. There is no number 10….yep. that’s just how I roll
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July 13th, 2008
This post is Part One of a true story. A story about Adam and I getting pregnant before marriage and how it has made our life together complicated, painful, wonderful and FULL of surprises. A story of how love can grow in even the most unlikely situations.
Adam and I should have known better. We actually did know better and we chose to do it anyway. And guess what happens when you are young and careless and you care more about having fun than anything else? You get pregnant! What a shocker huh?
So I was 19 years old and I had just quit college because you know it was really putting a damper on my social life.
I was working in a clothing store and I had SUCH a bright future in that promising career path. Adam was in college and he actually had enough drive and personal ambition for the both of us.
Have I mentioned that he is a very talented musician? It is one of the reasons I fell in love with him. He plays bass, both electric and upright. He can play anything, but he loves Jazz and when we started dating I suddenly realized that there was more to the music world than just Incubus, Eminem, and Madonna.
That’s a little bit of an exaggeration…I wasn’t totally musically ignorant.
Nope…I liked Green Day too.
Kidding…Kidding! I really had pretty diverse musical taste, it had just never included Jazz.
I still don’t like ALL of the Jazz that Adam likes, but I do know enough about it to know that Kenny G is not real Jazz. Just ask Adam, he has quite an opinion on that. I actually do enjoy most of what he plays and listens to. I guess in my own long winded way I am saying that Adam broadened my horizons in terms of music. Whew…can you imagine being married to me? I talk A LOT!
Ok, so he was in college getting his degree in Jazz studies and I was Sales Associate Extraordinaire. I had no direction, I spent more money on cigarettes and alcohol than I did on food, and I lived in a fantasy world. Can you imagine how my parents felt the day I told them that they were going to be grandparents? I mean my mom was 39 years old…and my dad 40!
Well, I never expected the way I would feel after that test turned out to be positive. The very minute I found out that life was growing inside me I was in love with the idea of being a mother.
Sure I was freaking out. I mean up until that point I was living in a basement apartment in a party house full of my friends. We were THE coolest people on earth in our opinions.
But you know what?
I suddenly had a purpose. It was the best thing that ever happened to me. I had to grow up in an instant. I had to stop being so very very selfish.
Adam had a bit of a harder time grasping reality I think. I mean we were just kids you know? We decided not to get married right away. We didn’t want to jump into marriage just because we were going to be parents. The good news was that we both had a very strong support system, and even better….we liked each other a lot.
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