I have talked a lot about how I got pregnant with our oldest daughter when Adam and I hadn’t been dating very long and how that has affected the dynamics of our relationship over the past 8 years.  I am not even close to being finished telling that story and I am planning on writing Part 6 of  The Truth Is series very soon.  If you haven’t read it and you are interested then you should go catch up.

It’s ok I will wait.  No really go ahead….I will totally be here when you get back.

So yeah we were very young and scared and we were having a baby.  Toward the end of my pregnancy my blood pressure started to rise and my doctor advised me to stop working.  I was swelling and he was concerned that I might be heading into preeclampsia.  About 2 weeks from my due date which was May 11th, 2001 we went in for our prenatal appointment.  I was so ready to have our baby even though I had no idea what to expect.

People tell you things that you should listen closer to and you hear them, but you just can’t know how you will feel until you experience it.  That day at the doctor’s office my blood pressure was dangerously high and I was so swollen that I didn’t recognize myself.  So my Dr sent us home to get our stuff and told us to get to the hospital for an induction.

I won’t go into the whole birth story, but to make a long story short I was in labor for what seemed like 12 yrs and everyone thought I would NEVER dilate.  But I finally did and the epidural worked so well that you could have sawed off my foot and I wouldn’t have felt it.  I was so numb that the Dr had to put this suction cup thing on Addison’s head and help me get her out.  It was traumatic to say the least.  But finally she was here.

I had been watching TLC’s A Baby Story for weeks so I knew this was the part where the baby was supposed to cry.  But she didn’t make a sound.  She was limp and sort of a purplish color and I knew something was wrong.  Adam’s mom immediately dropped to her knees and started praying and I was just in shock.  A whole team of people came in and they were rubbing her and suctioning her.  She started to wiggle around and she was trying really hard to cry.  She was making these little sounds and her chest was filling up and collapsing and you could tell she was struggling to breathe.

After about 15 or 20 minutes they let me hold her for like 30 seconds.  Then they whisked her away to the NICU.  A few minutes later a woman came in to talk to me about Addison’s health.  She was a pediatrician  and she was very direct.  She told me my baby was very sick but they weren’t sure what was wrong.  She said she was pretty sure Addison had inhaled fluid and it had gone into her lungs.  She said it could be pneumonia and that they were giving her oxygen and medicine.  I asked her if she was ok and she told me simply and honestly “no”.

I remember being shocked.   It was one of those moments that doesn’t feel real and you are sort of outside of yourself.  The hospital where she was born has an excellent NICU and she was in really good hands.  There were babies in there who were much sicker than Addison and although it was a serious situation for us I couldn’t help but feeling slightly thankful.  I prayed very hard for our baby but I also prayed for the health of all of the other babies.

Looking back at the pictures I realize how rough she looked.  I only remember thinking that she was the most beautiful baby I had ever seen.  I don’t think I will ever forget the smell of the soap that you had to wash your hands with before you could come in or the sound of all of those machines beeping.

We were young and totally unprepared, but I think the experience brought us all closer as a family.  Addison coming into our lives made such a positive impact on us and changed our future forever.  She made a full recovery from her traumatic beginning and after 6 days in the hospital we took her home.

And literally 5 minutes after we got home with her from the hospital she gave me another kind of shock…..

I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry….so I did both.

It was just her little way of saying welcome to motherhood.

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